Posts Tagged ‘Mythology’

When we left our handsome hero, he was preparing for the long journey to the Cupcake Castle. He hastily hurried through his humble hut, hoping to hand the heroine (Andrea) the hugely important Golden Spoon. Little did he know, the Rotten Dairy Dragon was watching his every move.

Austin gathered up what he needed: provisions for the long journey; a Butter knife (a Butter was a small, rabbit-like creature that hopped through the woods in the land of ICK. Butter knives were particularly adept at killing the swift animals); a bow whose string was made from the finest spun cotton candy; and a sheath of arrows made from sharpened peppermint candy. He was almost ready!

He needed to acquire one more thing for the journey—ever since the Rotten Dairy Dragon killed his trusty steed, Eric, he was in desperate need of a horse. His first stop was going to be Old Man Alex’s ranch. Taking a chocolate-covered pretzel walking stick, Austin began the march to the ranch.

Old Man Alex lived on a beautiful ranch that was tucked into the farthest corner of the Mudslide Hills. It was incredibly dangerous to get to—one never knew when the hills would begin sliding down onto the path to drown any traveler in an avalanche of death by chocolate—so Austin had to keep his wits about him. No one knew how Old Man Alex was able to get in and out of the Mudslide Hills in order to get to his ranch.

Austin entered into the Mudslide Hills carefully. Giant piles of chocolate rose on either side of him, and he kept to the narrow path. Warily, he looked around for any sign of movement.

All the while, the Rotten Dairy Dragon kept watch. He knew that if he was patient, he’d have a chance to trap Austin in the mudslides and steal the Golden Spoon.

After an hour of careful hiking, Austin made it to the entrance of Old Man Alex’s ranch. As he walked up the path to the gate, the wizened old man opened the door to his graham cracker ranch house and met Austin outside. He was dressed in the garb of the hill people: an old sweatshirt on top of a flannel button-down with pants that had holes in them.
“It’s been too long, old friend,” exclaimed Austin as they gave each other a firm hug.
“Say that,” replied Alex, in an odd expression of agreement. “What can I do for you, young man?”
“I need a horse. Tragically, mine was killed by the Rotten Dairy Dragon.” Austin began to tell Old Man Alex about the discovery of the Golden Spoon, and immediately Alex’s face lit up.
“You must return that to Princess Andrea! I will help in any way that I can! Come with me.”
Alex led Austin out the back door of the ranch house and to a giant stable out back.
“Austin, I have something important to show you. You must tell no one about this.”
Austin agreed to keep the secret.
Alex continued, “Have you ever wondered how I am able to get through the Mudslide Hills to leave and enter my ranch?”
“Of course!” Austin replied. “Everyone wonders how you are able to safely navigate this treacherous land!”
“Let me show you,” said Alex, as he opened the door to the stable. As the door opened, Austin gasped.
“It’s…it’s a Pegasus,” he said softly.
The creature stood magnificently, strong and confident. It was completely white, with a splash of black fur over its heart. Upon seeing Austin, it immediately spread its wings and began to paw at the ground, excited by the presence of the newcomer.
“I have been getting too old to ride him recently,” explained Alex. “I think you should have him. He will allow you to reach the Cupcake Castle. His name is Jerod, though he responds to ‘Feez’ for some reason.”
“You mean, I can keep him?” asked Austin.
“He will be of tremendous help on your journey. And I am getting too old. Take him, he’s yours now.”

Austin was overwhelmed. He looked at the animal, and then in one swift motion, he jumped on Jerod’s back. Jerod became restless at first, uneasy with the new rider. However, it didn’t take long for animal and man to get used to each other. With his wings folded back, Jerod trotted out of the stable with Austin on his back. Alex walked up and, with a twinkle in his eye, slapped the Pegasus on the rump.

Jerod immediately took flight. With a sudden leap, his wings spread and he was climbing high into the sky. Austin clung for dear life, his arms wrapped around the creature’s neck as they climbed higher and higher in elevation. It was exhilarating, and Austin knew that Jerod was testing his ability as a rider. Austin immediately straightened up and grabbed the mane with both hands.

“Easy,” he whispered, calmly. “Easy, boy. Easy.”
Jerod slowed his ascent and began flying at an easy pace. They began flying away from the outskirts of ICK and toward the other side where the Cupcake Castle stood tall.

The Rotten Dairy Dragon couldn’t believe his eyes. He had been watching from the far hill, waiting to create a mudslide as Austin left the Mudslide Hills. But Austin didn’t walk back on the path—he took flight on the back of a Pegasus!

The dragon had to think fast…and then he remembered the scones. The dragon quickly began flying after them, faster and faster. As he approached the Pegasus, he opened his mouth wide…

Austin turned just in time to see the dark shape coming toward them. He saw the mouth of the dragon open, aimed straight at them. The dragon remembered that it had eaten some stale scones that morning. (It is a little known fact that, on top of the ability to breathe fire, most dragons can also projectile-vomit a fiery concoction of the food that they have consumed that day.)

The dragon, mouth agape, began shooting vomit-covered, flaming scones at Austin and Jerod. The stinky, slimy, sticky scones speedily shot with a sour, sick stench through the summer air.

Austin dodged out of the way just in time as a stale, flaming scone shot past his head.
“Jerod, dive!!” he shouted.
They dropped; maneuvering and using every ounce of agility they could muster, they narrowly escaped the dastardly dragon’s barrage of bile. But he was persistent and fueled by anger. He sped after them, still shooting flaming scones from his terrible jaws.

“Shoot, how many scones did he eat?!” yelled Jerod.
“Wait, you can talk?” Austin yelled back, incredulous.
“Of course! I am a freaking mythological creature!”
“Okay, well get us out of here!”

Jerod swooped downward again, enough to make Austin’s stomach churn. They flew faster and faster, away from the dragon. Suddenly, Austin had an idea. He pulled out some of his Oreos that he had gathered from his field and packed for the trip. The Dairy Dragon couldn’t resist feasting on chocolate sandwich cookies. Austin began throwing Oreos toward the dragon.

Immediately, the dragon wasn’t sure what to do next. He wanted to continue chasing after Austin and the Golden Spoon, but he also wanted to eat Oreos. To eat the cookies, though, he’d have to stop vomiting the stale scones!

The dragon, paralyzed by indecision, stopped shooting scones from his mouth and began distractedly searching for the Oreos that had been thrown. He dove toward the ground, combing the landscape for the cookies.

Meanwhile, Austin and Jerod had narrowly escaped. Ready for some much-needed rest, they found a place to make camp and slept, dreaming about what the next day of their adventure would bring.

Little did they know that the Dairy Dragon was not far behind.

To be continued…


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